It was a perfect storm, really. I started my workday wondering where my paycheck was while writing a bunch of content at 7:30 in the morning. I raced to the office once the issue was resolved and wrote some more, completed two newsletters and raced back home to make dinner. Even after a 40-minute break I was tired. And then the computer slowed to a stab-worthy crawl while the program we use for newsletters, my third for the day, decided to get fussy. Nothing beats watching helplessly as something that should take 30 minutes extends cruely to an hour and a half. Technology, you fickle fuck.
I gave up and got up at six this morning to finish. I still don’t know whether it was my computer, the program or a little of both. All I know is that I am late to the office, and need coffee as desperately as I need Wednesday to stop acting like it’s Monday.
Two and a half weeks to go until I am done waiting for the next chapter of my professional life. I have to start dotting my i’s and crossing my t’s. A giant to-do list of things I must not forget to prepare, to set up, to have ready, to refresh and to learn occupies my headspace. I don’t know what I would do without Rik. Probably have a small nervous breakdown while trying to get everything done while watching the laundry pile grow. He constantly ticks things off my list so I have one less worry.
How do you not notice that you are the only asshole on the train talking. And super loud at that. #quietcar #metronorth
These are the longest five minutes of my life right now, waiting for this train to show, and knowing that it will probably be late. I cannot stop the butterflies in my stomach. Their frantic dance does not keep time with my heart’s pace. It is a calm chaos that promises relief only after a few more moments of discomfort. In my mind I make lists while noting that the bastard train is indeed late. I see it now, finally crawling in. Just a few more hours now. I am so close.
Crawling to Hastings trying to calm the butterflies in my stomach…
When it suddenly smells like ass on the Metro North and you realize you’re just passing through Ludlow.